Forget and Forgive
I sometimes feel that those who waste time holding a grudge against someone you love and care for or don't care for is a pointless thing to do. I could go on and on with the list of possible people you hold a grudge to who probably don't even give a crap of how you feel or if you are holding a grudge. Life is too short to hate someone and even shorter to hold a grudge for someone they did like ten years or three months ago. If you truly love someone or care for that person who caused you such intense pain for you to hold a grudge or a strong negative feeling towards them, you would choose to forget and forgive. Because if you really do still care for them or even have a shred of love and care for them left, you would find love triumphs over your grudge against them.
Many would say that it is easier said than done but not entirely impossible. You just need a big enough heart to forget what happened and be willing to let go of what happened. It's not the end of the world because it could happen again with a different person. Yes, forgetting what happened isn't easy because you suffered a great pain and emotional trauma but think of what reason the other party had and why they did it at that time. Be in their shoes. Don't only think of yourself.
If you only think of yourself, you are only mentally and emotionally torturing yourself while the other party may not even be aware that you are bearing such a deep grudge against them when it may have been a simple matter or complicated depending on the nature of the incident. If you are unwilling to forgive and forget, then you are only hindering your own movement towards a better future. Your stubbornness in choosing to keep remembering what happened will eat you up and you would probably do crazy acts that will have severe consequences.
Don't most major religions teach us to forgive and forget? To accept others for all they are and most importantly to accept yourself? This is the only way you can move forward and when you see those that hurt you again, you can be able to say: 'let's start fresh from page one.' Nothing is impossible as long as you are willing to let go of your own stubbornness of your grudge and willing to forget the pain you suffered. Don't see it as pain you suffered but choose to see it as a lesson learned and an experience that made you stronger. :) So please practice forgive and forget each day.
Take a moment to think about this sometimes. Do you really detest and hate them that much? Is it a grudge that cannot be forgiven and forgotten? Are you willing to use so much time and energy to resent them for years on end? Everyone can be forgiven for anything no matter how horrible it was. The problem is if you are willing to give them a second chance and willing to start afresh no matter what they did.